August 31, 2012


Something came across my path this morning and it triggered a thought. What does the word play mean to you? 

As many of you know Master and I are poly. However, I've been struggling with my feelings around that right now, it is most likely to do with my growth and changes I have been going through in my vanilla life as I come to acceptance of some things. 

Play to me can mean sex or it can mean doing a public or private scene.  For me, negotiating and discussion on what is understood is huge. I never leave anything to be assumed.

When Master says do you want to play? I know he is referring to a scene that usually incorporates sex into our time together. In fact most if not all my play partners in my BDSM experience sex has always been a factor. But what does it mean to you? 

There are people who do not incorporate sexual activity into their relationships. In fact, "back in the day" sex had nothing to do with BDSM scenes. I often have wondered if it is the combination of arisen endorphin's, sexual chemistry and energy, that have encouraged physical intimacy? 

If it is your first time playing, emotions can and often do come to the surface, causing you to potentially feel like you have found your partner, your life mate, when on his/her side it was nothing more than part of a scene, the moment now long past, he/she has gone on about their life; yet you are still riding the waves of your experience, hoping for more and often! I know what that feels like, I'm sure a few of us know what that feels like, especially when you haven't had a mentor to advise you and teach you what to look for. 

When I am at a swinging event, play means "let's have sex". I've never heard it used any other way. 

Master has been talking to someone who is very interested in Him. She is eager to play, yet I do not know what that means to her. My gut and assumption says it is sex, but does it? She is new to the lifestyle, and I remember what it was like to be exposed to all the excitement and wonder. Wanting to feel every emotion, every flogger, spank and blind fold. To being that kid in the proverbial candy store wanting to eat every sweet, succulent yummy bit of sugar you can touch, til you are overloaded. 

It leaves me uneasy.

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