September 21, 2011

There's Always a Chance~ There's Always a Choice

I had just finished watching the X-Factor and a contestant said those words in my post line. Those words resonated with me and I knew then that I had my topic for my next post. 


There's Always a Chance ~ There's Always a Choice. 


Life is about taking chances, just as life is about choices we make and in some situations there are consequences for those choices. 


I've been focusing a fair bit on issues surrounding choices and chances in my life. I struggle with these daily. The reason being is quite simple, I am not used to having choices or chances. I have always felt there was either a black or a white thought process, in other words there was either a "yes" or "no" answer. I am wanting there to be more "grey"; in other words, I am wanting to have flexibility, to be more relaxed and less rigid, there is a difference in being a doormat, just to be clear, as I am not one. 


Being a woman who has suffered with matters of a personal nature, I have spent some time away from friends. It isn't that I haven't wanted friends, if anything it is quite the opposite. But the fears surrounding trust had been allowed to take over, so the consequence of choosing to be alone versus taking the risk of making friends is that I had been alone more than with people and consequently at times depression made an appearance. 


I realized something vital, something so pertinent that helped remove a layer of negative energy and replaced it with positive thoughts. Most of my teenage life/young adult life has been marred with those that were once in my life who felt I was not worthy of being in their life. Those who were at one time claiming I was not healthy, claiming that it was the fault of persons who I knew couldn't possibly have anything to do with my being unwell. It has taken a long time for me to become healthy and well; to become the very person I am now. To remove the negative energy that I have, just as the statement says


There's Always a Chance ~ There's Always a Choice. 


The leg work is worth the results, it is ongoing, and steady; after all it isn't like I just arrived one day unsure, anxious and depressed. There had to be substantial reasons that lead me to that the road of self discovery.  I choose to not be ashamed, however, I have been made to feel ashamed. I have felt the stigma of people unsure of what to say to me, or that they feel like I have a disease~ that they are going to catch it. (Just what is "it" anyway?) It is like being bullied for an invisible disease, a disease that we all have within us that can reveal itself at any time. It is called MENTAL ILLNESS and it is nothing to be ashamed of, scared of, or embarrassed of. 


There is Help, There is Hope, There is Light, There is Love, You Are NOT alone.


If ANYONE reading my blog needs or wants someone to talk to, email me anytime, and I will reply back in confidence. 



2 comments:

  1. "I have spent some time away from friends. It isn't that I haven't wanted friends, if anything it is quite the opposite. But the fears surrounding trust had been allowed to take over, so the consequence of choosing to be alone versus taking the risk of making friends is that I had been alone more than with people and consequently at times depression made an appearance."

    I could totally relate to what you said. I've had some people break a lot of trust with me including my own parents. Hard to trust anyone if you can't trust your own parents. It's affected my friendships with people and I've become a bit of a hermit.

    I really enjoyed your post today. Love your blog!
    Hugs,
    padme amidala

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  2. Thank you padme amidala for taking the time to share your thoughts on my blog today I really appreciate that. I've been attending various workshops and groups that are anywhere from 8weeks to 10weeks in length in our community that focus on things such as stress management, anger management, panic attacks, anxiety to name just a few. They don't cost any money as they are covered by our medical services plan.

    I feel if even one person learns that these services are available, that the word is getting out there, that the various pamphlets haven't been made in vain. I know I can't save every single soul, it isn't possible; but sharing my ups and downs in my blog gives others hope, then I'll accept that as progress.

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